Archives for posts with tag: God

Poetry in E-Motions

Poetry in emotions can be discovered and an excavated gem. Just like music and new behavioral rituals.  There is an adage that says that “in all of us there is a bit of a poet, musician, and insanity.”  When we FEEL strongly we often seek expressions of the energy.  If we use this energy creatively we can even capture and immortalize a moment. Thus in all our feelings we can find a poem, lyrics to music or behavioral rituals that may look insane to some individuals (such as having a party by the tomb of the deceased) that not only help us emote creatively but keep us sane.  Sometimes “abnormal” in an abnormal situation is normal. Have you ever caught yourself in any of these expressions?

Moving the energy of feelings so that we do not get stuck in it is healthy and the goal of healing.

This is another exercise for creative expression of feelings, whether they be sad, happy or of any color of the rainbow.

Exercise: Think of things that remind you of something or someone that nudges your heart in a downward spin or if you prefer an upward spin of emotions such as loss, pain or joy. List the things.  Use the poem below of as an example of how these things can all be triggers for these feelings. Create one in a similar style with the things that are unique to what you jotted down.  In the end celebrate what you have created with the power of words and how you have captured and memorialized something or someone special to you.

 

     IT’S YOU I MISS 

It’s the phone call I’ll never get

And the number I’ll never dial

The fresh cut rose from your garden I will never smell

The chocolates we won’t taste and share

Nor the toasts we’d make over wine we’d sip

It’s the books we’d read and discuss at length

And the music we danced and sang to all night

The meals we’d prepare to dine without hurry

And the stars in the sky we’d count for hours

The strolls by the lake we would often make

And the country drives we’d often take

It’s the peaceful sunsets we’d contemplate

And the morning songbirds we’d awaken to

It’s your touch

Your taste

Your smell

Your gentleness

Your caress

Your kisses

Your embraces

Your voice

Your caring

Your presence

 

It’s you… I miss

 

This is a poem on page 24 from Candles in the Dark…poems to grieve, hope and love again.

Welcome Poetry in E-Motions and discover the unique poet in you and the gems of poetry that can be excavated in all e-motions.

 www.mariahildapinon.com

Maria Hilda Pinon, author of The Willows of Corona, a novel, and Candles in the Dark…poems to grieve, hope and love again.

With an understanding of the process and roadmap of grief…it is time to do some work to release the old lingering feelings of loss. This is an exercise to help us work through any of our losses.  It is a process not a onetime event and exercise so repeat as often as necessary. And by all means seek professional help if you or others deem necessary.

First take an inventory of all the unfinished loss you are carrying around. Go as far back as you would like and is necessary. The size of the loss is not what matters; it is how you feel about it. It can be loss about innocence, youth, ideas, jobs, relationships, dreams, pets…anything you have given meaning to. Make the list as long as is necessary to dig up all the toxic pile.  Jot each one down in one word or statement.  

Take a deep breath as you think about each. Write one salient feeling associated with each one. On a scale of 0-10 (10 being the strongest possible feeling) rate each one. Work with the strongest ones first or weakest ones if you prefer. You goal as you experience each one is to slowly see a drop in your rating scale of each so that a 9 becomes an 8 and so on, until it is at a 0 when possible.  (There are some losses that will always leave a residual sting and perhaps a zero is not the desired goal such as when a parent loses a child. Yet it is possible for many to get to zero.) Remember lowering the rating scale is about the intensity of the feeling, not about your level of care for the loss.  You will always care about it but it will be a source of joy and strength in the future when your grief work is over.  

How do you know which losses are still lingering?  How do you know when your grief over a loss is over?  How you feel about it when you recall it will tell it all.

Whenever you think about or see anything that reminds you of your loss, you will feel a shift in your emotional state.  If you are not finished with your grief work, the shift is downward, diminishing, and restrictive, you may not want to go there as you “will feel bad all over again”. The emotional strings get pulled and you have a reaction to stop the feeling, escape, make it go away, make it go under a façade again.  Usually they are feelings of anger, sadness, guilt, fear or shame.

Welcome this visit from your feelings instead.  This is the opportunity for coming face to face with these feelings that pull us down and are tying up our energy in the wrong direction. Sit with your feelings and letting them just be and experience their aliveness in our being until they dissipate. Resist holding onto them or pushing them away. Just letting them be gives a sense of relief, just like when you go empty your bladder. You will feel better and lighter.  The feelings may surface again at a later time, but let them be. Name them and let them visit and let them pass through you. Repeat as often as they visit. 

Eventually you do run dry and then when empty you can be filled with more light and loving energy that is always there waiting to drop in on us. Remember when the feelings are reduced you will be able to hear the thoughts related to those feelings and can explore and challenge any self-defeating or limiting ones.

If when you think about it, you feel truly peaceful and can find strength in the experience of the past and have drawn insights or just feel complete with the ending, then your grief over that issue is over.  You will have no adverse feelings, only peace and perhaps joy as it was a great learning opportunity for you and now a part of your life history you can stand on with calm and acceptance.

Do this exercise as often as you need to and work on as many issues as are necessary. The reward is more energy for being more of the best you.  The healed and transformed you. Remember you are the author of your life.

www.mariahildapinon.com

Maria Hilda Pinon, author of The Willows of Corona, a novel, and Candles in the Dark…poems to grieve, hope and love again.

There are some things in life we can change. There are some things in life we cannot change. If we can change it, we then seek solutions, but if we cannot change it and it was significant to us, then we need to grieve our loss. It is amazing how easy it is to get stuck on the journey of grief.  The two favorite parking places are depression and anger. There are those that choose to stay depressed as a way of life and those that carry a chip on their shoulder as a way of life.

 It is important to know that grief is a journey…an emotional one measured by the content and quality of the loss. Grief is not a mental experience nor defined by an objective standard.  We are in grief when we organize our life around our loss…that which is gone and absent.  And grief will continue until we organize and readjust our life to that which is present and around us.  Yet having a mental road map keeps us moving, normalizes our experience and validates our feelings along the way. The road map is not a fixed one and we can move forward and backward on the myriad of feelings. There are many books written on the steps of grieving and not all steps are identified with the same name or the number of steps. Elizabeth Kubler Ross  (On Death and Dying) and Granger Westberg,(Good Grief) both deceased offered many insights in their books from the work with those who grieve. Those of us who have lived grief can offer and expand on these insights. The steps are from Granger Westberg’s version, the explanation for each step morphs with my understanding and experience. 

Loss and grief are a universal experience; it crosses gender, age, socio-economics, and ethnicity, as well as cultural, religious and geographic divides. It unites us on the common ground of “meaning lost”. It seems no one escapes grief if we dare to care and love.

Loss happens and only we know how significant it is as we are the only ones that ascribe meaning to our loss.  So when loss happens in our life, the drama begins …yet without our acknowledging the drama. 

Shock and Denial quickly show up and we do not acknowledge the loss.  The reason of course is because the reality is often too much to bear all at once.  We cannot handle the dose of the reality.  It is like trying to stare at the sun all day without sunglasses. We cannot do this…so we are given the gift of shock and denial as a respite from the harshness.  But it is only temporary… we will move out of this place otherwise it is maladaptive to the process to remain in denial indefinitely. Shock and denial can last from a few minutes, hours, days and maybe weeks but then our facades break down and we release the emotions.

Sadness, Depression, Loneliness often follows the breakdown of our shock and denial.  A welter of emotions find their release in tears, but it can be overwhelming. If we do not move and release the emotion we can get stuck and get sick.  As long as we get triggered emotionally, it means our grief is not over, our work is not over. Notice the larger part of the word emotion is MOTION…keep the feelings moving through us. With these dampened feelings, we tend to isolate ourselves, lose interest in life and activities.  Life is hard to go on with, as there are so many adjustments, too many demands on us, yet, life goes on without us and we do not care. We feel no one cares, not even God.  We can experience despair.

Physical Symptoms of Distress can follow if we do not want to deal with the changes in our life, and we put up a front of being okay… our body soon will call us liars. We will experience symptoms of sleeplessness, or too much sleep, backaches, restlessness, eating too much or not enough, headaches; we can get sick. There is a strong relationship between illness and grief not dealt with in healthy ways. We are invited to re-examine how we look at life, explore our faith or lack of it.  Lost meaning invites us to create meaning again in our life. Beliefs are challenged.

Panic Strikes when we realize our life will never be the same again. We can think of nothing but the loss. We are hindered and less effective in everything we do. We cannot concentrate or focus and are paralyzed with fear.  The way we knew life is forever gone…forever hard to grasp.  We want to run away from life and living. We often slide back into the comfort of depression as we are familiar with it by now and social demands are eased. But how do we get out of this pit of panic…the scariest part of the grief… the realization things will never be the same again!!!!!!!!!! AGHHHH!!!! But just then the blessing of the energy of anger shows up!

to be continued…

Maria Hilda Pinon, author of The Willows of Corona, a novel, and Candles in the Dark…poems to grieve, hope and love again.

www.mariahildapinon.com

Now look at the wonder of all living things, in particular human beings.  Look at our capacity as beings gifted with intelligence, talents, a functioning body that strives to stay in balance and healthy (read about homeostasis and human physiology and stand in amazement), emotions, a mind, and a spirit part of the larger universal spirit…beings that have been given everything we need to make it in this world. 

The wonder of man and his achievements and accomplishments since the beginning of time speaks to the skill sets developed because of our imagination and intelligence and ability to create. Human beings create some amazing things in the world that improve life for all of us. Look all around you and notice that all things visible to us began as one person’s conception or idea and now it is embodied and part of our world. Appreciate all that you interact with from a toothbrush, to a fork, to the transportation we use, to the food we just shopped for, to the clothes we wear, to the phone we use and this computer that can transmit this message. It was an idea in someone’s beautiful mind at one time before it came into existence, including the intangibles like harmony.  

What we can craft is spectacular!  Imagine what one brilliant mind can do, imagine many brilliant minds working for the common good of all.  Imagine a world where each person gets to contribute their best to move humanity forward. Believe in yourself and all you are capable of being and giving to the world to make this a world we can be proud of and share with one another in joy.

 Can we co-create a world that by choice… we all get a chance…not a world that by chance… some get a choice?

What do you believe?

 Maria Hilda Pinon, author of The Willows of Corona, a novel, and Candles in the Dark…poems to grieve, hope and love again.

www.mariahildapinon.com

So of all there is to believe, what might be worth holding onto to encourage us to rise up to be our best selves? 

When we wake up each morning and we hold the gift of life flowing through us and we step into the wonder of nature and its majesty, we need to ask ourselves, do we have the individual capacity to orchestrate such events? Certainly, something bigger than us, is present and around us and within us. 

If we get scientific and take it back in time to the “no thing” of nothing that evolved to the all things and “everything” there is now, who or what had the vision that is unfolding before our eyes in this moment?  Is it not amazing how we are part of the evolution of time and history and are currently participating and shaping our world? Co-creating and constructing or destroying it as we live each day.

 Is it possible this higher, larger than life being or entity exists? Can we believe this benevolent source of life, (God, the Universe, Higher Being, Yahweh, Brahma, and Supreme Being, whatever name we choose) is a belief worth keeping?

 Yet we can choose not to believe.

However by choosing to believe in this source, creator, we get off our pedestal positions of wanting to be all-knowing ourselves and stave off some of our human proclivity toward arrogance that holds the view some beings are inherently more worthy than other human beings.  We invite humility (Latin root “humus”, meaning earth, soil) as a common ground we stand on from which to respect every individual since we all have inherent worth. We are who we are and can choose to be our best selves or our worst self. This belief in a Higher Being or Life Source allows us to be open to learn from other individual’s perspectives long enough to examine them thoughtfully and hold conversations of possibilities before we make individuals’ ideas wrong. It keeps us connected with awe and amazement to all living things especially each other and our capacity. We can be teachers to each other. We can choose to take the journey together and help each one of us make it.

Maria Hilda Pinon, author of The Willows of Corona, a novel, and Candles in the Dark…poems to grieve, hope and love again.

www.mariahildapinon.com

 

We never act outside of our belief system.  If we do, we generally experience dissonance or discomfort at some level.  We then can either change the action or change the belief to improve our experience of dissonance or discomfort.

If you wonder what your beliefs are, just observe your behavior or conduct. There is a belief you have that allows you to act on it without any feelings of discomfort at any level. For example, if you get involved with activities that promote health, it is probably because you believe this is something to support and live out or perhaps you believe you should do what other individuals with greater knowledge offer.

We are invited to believe in many things that can be at odds in many ways and make our life a very complex list of do’s and don’ts and potential conflicts. 

Some beliefs are myths… some unexamined and others more examined. We choose to believe the myths as true.  But, just because a large majority believes something, does not mean the belief is true anymore than when a small minority believes something and we believe it is untrue.  Our collective history evidences how some beliefs once held unshakeable, get abandoned.  Remember the time when slavery was common practice?   

Given the nature of how beliefs create the path we chose to walk, it is prudent to ask ourselves what we believe about any action we give time and energy to support and create.

If we are willing to loosen up our attachments to our beliefs long enough to examine them, we could learn about ourselves without getting so defensive or argumentative or aggressive when someone challenges a belief we hold.  Each challenge can help us clarify or perhaps liberate us of what can bind us and keep us from growing, moving forward or becoming more than we can be at any given moment. We can choose to stay in conversations of possibilities or gridlock them.  We can choose high roads or low roads. We can rise to an occasion of greatness or step into smallness. All greatness, now or in the past, comes from seeing possibilities and releasing some beliefs…  

 

Maria Hilda Pinon, author of The Willows of Corona, a novel, and Candles in the Dark…poems to grieve, hope and love again.

www.mariahildapinon.com

 

 

“People are often unreasonable and self-centered.

 Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives.

Be Kind anyway.

If you are honest, people may cheat you.

Be honest anyway.

If you find happiness, people may be jealous.

 Be happy anyway.

The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow.

  Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough

 Give your best anyway.

For you see, in the end, it is between you and God.

It was never between you and them anyway.”

 

Mother Theresa of Calcutta

www.mariahildapinon.com  Maria Hilda Pinon, author of The Willows of  Corona,a novel, and Candles in the Dark…poems to grieve, hope and love again.

The Journey onto your path of healing and evolving begins with your decision

Let us “walk the talk” and help each other evolve to higher consciousness….we journey together.

  Maria Hilda Pinon, author of The Willows of  Corona,a novel, andCandles in the Dark…poems to grieve, hope and love again.

www.mariahildapinon.com

Inspiration (in-spiritus) passes through us to invite us to be more than we are.  This blog is a “clearing house” of information, reflections, stories, techniques, quotes, and more  to help clear our own “house” at all levels, physical, mental, emotional, spiritual… to become the best we can be in this lifetime. To be our highest self not just for a moment once in a while, but in every moment all the while we are alive.   

Life is about relationship…connections to the highest source and being (whatever name we designate for him, her or it), to ourselves, to others and to all things.  As we heal and evolve, we will relate to our highest source and being, ourselves, others and all things free of that which keeps us from stepping into the greatest and deepest expression of our being!

You are invited to share all that has supported your own healing journey in your replies.

   Maria Hilda Pinon, author ofThe Willows of  Corona,a novel, andCandles in the Dark…poems to grieve, hope and love again.

www.mariahildapinon.com